Strangities Beastiary: Sharkaphant
There is little mention of the Sharkaphant in the records of history. A few ancient cave paintings that have been disputed as illustrations of one such creature (they are very smudged and are often interpreted as a wooly mammoth. However, the human depicted as hanging lifelessly from its jaws has led some scholars to believe that it is in fact a pictorial record of an encounter with a Sharkaphant) have been alternately accepted and rejected by archaeologists. Other than these we have only fossils of brutalized dinosaur bodies, all displaying a jaw configuration much more like a shark than other reptilian predators of the day. Most often these injuries are seen on the carcasses of Brontosauri or other large herbivoric species.
The first written mention of the Sharkaphant is found in early Bible manuscripts. Genesis chapter six verse four reads “ The Nephilim were on the earth in those days, and also afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of men, and they bore [children] to them. Those were the mighty men who [were] of old, men of renown.” (New American Standard Version, copyright The Lockman Foundation) Recent discoveries in ancient Aramaic have brought to light that the word “Nephilim” literally translated means “A large land dwelling creature with the head of a shark and the enormous leathery body of an elephant.” (Most biblical scholars up until recently had misunderstood this, instead believing that the word referred to a race of giants.)
Between this biblical notation and the dated photograph you see above there is almost no mention of the creature throughout mankind’s records. (Most Sharkaphant enthusiasts attribute this to the fact that if an individual were to intrude on their territory and see one in the flesh they would almost certainly have been eaten immediately.) Known to be highly carnivorous from studies conducted on the single Sharkaphant skeleton that was uncovered (and summarily lost or stolen during its transport to the Museum of Natural History) during a dig in central Africa, The Sharkaphant was nature’s perfect hunter. Their gills enabled them to stay underwater for long periods of time, while their remarkably mammalian lungs would reassert themselves while the creature was on land. It is believed they were warm blooded and gave birth to live young. Anecdotes from central African tribes place them as traveling in small packs, with a bull Sharkaphant leading several females and their young. An annual migration to the coastline was almost universally avoided by ancient peoples, (those who set out to observe the animals were never heard from again) so we have no record of what actually took place between the beasts, but it is said that it took place some time in late September or early October.
This singular photograph we have of a living Sharkaphant was taken during World War II at secret Nazi installation located in Africa. Hitler had succeeded in somehow capturing a breeding pair of Sharkaphants and at the time the photo was taken was seeking to domesticate them into service of the Nazi regime. Bits of documents recovered indicate that soon after the photo was taken the Sharkaphants summarily devoured and destroyed the entire experimental facility, leaving the photographer, (Henrich von Gimmelschnitzcher, who had left earlier that day,) as the only living human to see them. Hitler, enraged by the death of his nephew at the hands (or jaws, rather. Hitler’s nephew was a research scientist) of the beast, ordered their summary destruction under the guise of invading Africa. It would seem his initiative was successful despite the eventual defeat of the Nazis in Africa by Allied forces, for no Sharkaphant sightings have been reported since. (Which could also mean they still exist but have again devoured anyone who might have seen them.)
Please join with all of us here at Strangities in remembering this noble but deadly beast. (Preferably by devouring a German or perhaps a co-worker who invades your personal space.)
